ON THE CIVILITY OF CHILDREN'S BEHAVIOUR
ERASMUS OF ROTTERDAM
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"When did you last tell your children to put their hand over their mouth when they yawn? When did you last suggest that when they are introduced to someone they should shake hands firmly and look them in the eye? Do you suggest that they should wait until everyone is served before they eat? Do you demand that your young daughter dress decorously lest she elicit outraged looks? Do you think that the children of today have disgraceful manners? Unlike, of course, when you were young... Well, that's certainly what Erasmus of Rotterdam thought in 1530 when he published De Civilitate Morum Puerilium: On the Civility of Children's Behaviour. He was outraged at the youth of his day. They were ill-disciplined and uncouth and he decided to write a short book addressed at these miscreants to tell them what good manners meant. After all, as William of Wickam memorably said in the 1350s, 'Manners maketh man'.
On the Civility of Children's Behaviour is considered to be the first treatise in Western Europe on the moral and practical education of children. It was a massive bestseller - indeed the biggest selling book of the sixteenth century - going into 130 editions over 300 years and being translated into 22 languages within ten years of its publication. In it, Erasmus concerns himself with matters such as how to dress, how to behave at table, how to converse with one's elders and contemporaries, how to address the opposite sex and much else. For example:
Table Manners
'To lick greasy fingers or to wipe them on your coat is impolite. It is better to use the table cloth or the serviette.'
'Some people put their hands in the dishes the moment they have sat down. Wolves do that.'
'You should not offer your handkerchief to anyone unless it has been freshly washed. Nor is it seemly, after wiping your nose, to spread out your handkerchief and peer into it as if pearl and rubies might have fallen out of your head.'
'Do not move back and forth on your chair. Whoever does that gives the impression of constantly breaking or trying to break wind.'
The advice is as relevant today at it was 500 years ago."
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